“We don’t know them all but we owe them all.”
– Unknown
Often Memorial Day is celebrated as a tribute only for the wounded, maimed or killed in battle. Indeed, it is certainly a time to consider and honor their sacrifice. In these times of conflict in so many corners of the world, we’re not limited in number of those vanquished prematurely.
Along with these fallen, I suspect that many of us contemplate our own non-military losses as well. A day to observe all who are “gone but not forgotten” reverberates in many hearts. When my friend Kathleen suffered the loss of her mom recently, she shared a phrase she’d read, and which I think would comfort many who grieve.
“Shared Sorrow is Half Sorrow.”
— David French
Time for All of Us
Sharing may reduce the sorrow. It need not be restricted to redistributing our forlorn bereavement. Re-telling cherished stories and favorite anecdotes of lives now complete can bring smiles, momentarily replacing the grief. Indeed, reducing and halving the sorrow is also accomplished by celebrating the life.
It’s not selfish to memorialize loved ones at the same time we venerate those lost in battle. They are, of course, sometimes the same.
“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”
— Theodore Geisel
I have a friend in Scottsdale, Arizona who always sends email on the day her husband Doug, died. She also sends them (along with lovely pictures) on his birthday, which she still lovingly celebrates. It reminds me of something I frequently read people say on Facebook or other social media. “When I post about my loved one, it is not to get sympathy. It’s to keep their memory alive.”
That’s our job – to keep the memory alive. That memory is our personal treasure, whether we choose to reveal it to others or not.
“What we have once enjoyed we can never lose.
All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.”
–Helen Keller
Our Role on Memorial Day
We are always told to enjoy the little things in life. Stop and smell the proverbial roses is a common refrain. It’s often followed by a charge to think of what you will consider important on your death bed. Likely, we’ll look back and realize that those little things which we tried to enjoy were indeed all the BIG things. Mostly, the people. We generate new remembrances while fashioning a sanctuary for the old ones.
We are the ones who recollect. We are left behind to live. Yet, in our hearts and mind we relish those memories and preserve a legacy of those who left too-soon before us.
“A great soul serves everyone all the time.
A great soul never dies.
It brings us together again and again.”
– Maya Angelou
Final Thought
Our role is to be a Remember(er).
I thought to end with a song by Bob Dylan, which lyrics declare: “I’ll remember you. When I’ve forgotten all the rest. You to me were true. You to me were the best.” But I prefer another song by the same title “I’ll Remember You” by Makaha Sons of Ni’ihau. I’ll share that instead and repeat what I think our role is this Memorial Day.
Our role is to be a Remember(er).
Makaha Sons Of Ni`ihau-I’ll Remember You
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Title picture credit: Sunset – Image by Cindy Lever from Pixabay
